Happy June everyone! We're using the concept of time to move through this month, starting off with the present. A lot of time is spent on the past...thinking of what once was...what we used to have. And a lot of time is spent in the future...what could be...what should be. But what about now? Are you experiencing this very moment? Taylor has quite a few reflection questions hidden in this episode so grab your journal and get ready to settle into the now.
Mentioned In The Episode
We're hosting a free workshop - What's Next? The Myth of Uncertainty (and what to seek instead). RSVP to save your spot!
Welcome back to Inner Warmup where your inner work begins. My name is Taylor Elyse Morrison, creator of Inner Workout, and you as always are our expert guest. Thanks for being here. So we are entering a new month and this month, we are exploring our relationship to time. We're starting this week with the present, and then we're gonna get into the past and the future. And as I was mapping out this episode, the image that came to mind was like being in an airport or a mall, some big bustling place. And you have those maps that are, you know, they're like signs, and you walk up to them. And you see, oh, here are the restaurants here, the women's clothing stores here, the shoe stores, etc. And there's normally that circle somewhere on the map that says you are here. And that's what I want us to find today, is that you are here sticker for our lives, wherever we are today.
And talking about the present is something that is just endlessly interesting to me because I am not naturally a person who is present. And I don't think that's just a struggle that I have, I hear it with a lot of people. We can tend to, and even though my assumption is that other people also struggle with being present, I'll speak from the I. I can have a tendency to want to focus on where I've been in the past or where I'm going in the future. And even when I'm being present, I'm thinking about my present moment in relationship to where I've been or where I think I need to be, where I should be in the near future. And it's just, I wonder why we do that? Because the present is all that we have. This isn't a revolutionary thought and it also still just hits me so hard when I sit and think about the fact that this moment, where I am sitting here recording speaking in a mic to you is the only thing that is real and true for me right now, this present moment is all that I have.
I can spend time thinking about the past but the past doesn't exist anymore. The past is a memory, a memory that we sometimes like to add our own spin on. Or I can spend my time which is my personal favorite in the future, what will be, what should be, what might be. I spend so much of my time in the past or the future, when the present is the thing that is in front of me. It’s the only thing that I can grasp. And even when I can get to that place where I am in the present, I don't know if I'm experiencing the reality of the present. That's the question that we have on the docket today is what is your present reality? And I noticed in myself that I like to either idealize the present, or analyze the present. You might also say I can be in these moments where I only want to look at the things that are good, or that feel good. And I want to shun anything that would make me feel uncomfortable, or is difficult to engage with. And then on the other end of the spectrum, sometimes I demonize the present. I'm so convinced that the present is not where I “should be”, that word again should. And so I'm convinced that everything is wrong and bad.
And it's kind of like when you have a rain cloud, a metaphorical rain cloud, over your head and it's like you just can't see anything but rain. Can't imagine that there's sunshine beyond your own personal rain cloud or it's like having rose colored glasses where you only want to see what's beautiful, and you don't want to engage with the yuck and the messiness. But for us to engage with our present reality, we have to be willing to sit with multiple emotions, multiple sensations, multiple experiences. And I think the past couple of years, at least for me, have forced me to do this more often than I would do on my own.
I can think of moments where I was having experiencing joy or gratitude, or appreciation for something. And at the same time, I was feeling sadness or fear or confusion or anger. And those two emotions weren't necessarily in conflict with each other, they were just sitting together. Because being a human in 2022, means that you are most likely having to hold space, or you might be better served if you could hold space for multiple things to be true, multiple emotions to coexist, multiple things that can be true in the season of your life. And so today, what I want to encourage you to do as you reflect on this question, what is your present reality, is to root yourself as much as possible in the now. Not in the past, not in the future, but in what is happening now. And I want you to dig into what is real. Try to weed out the subjectivity, the shoulds. The, this is what that other person over there is doing. The question is about your present reality, not their present reality. Not your present reality if you were better, were different. Your present reality as it exist for you today. And I know that question, what is your present reality, is a broad question, so if you're looking for something to help you make it feel a little bit more tangible, more concrete, I'd invite you to consider these three sub questions:
Where are you? And again, that's still a pretty broad question. Where are you could include where you're sitting. I'm sitting in my dining room in Chicago right now but it also could be where are you in life? Where are you in the season of life?
The next question is, who are you? What are your identities that you hold? Your beliefs? The descriptors that you would use to describe yourself or introduce yourself to others? Who are you?
And then finally, how are you? How are you feeling? How are you moving through the world?
So where are you? Who are you? And how are you? All three of those, if you can answer those honestly, again, getting out the subjectivity of is it good or bad, that these are part of my present reality. You're just stating facts right now, as objectively as possible. When you can engage with those questions, you'll have a pretty good sense of what your present reality is. And once I did that, it was interesting to just see all the different ways that I described myself and thought of myself in this moment, that I maybe wouldn't have thought of before. So I'm going to give you some time to reflect, like I always do, on this question: what is your present reality? And the sub questions: where are you, who are you, and how are you? And then come back and listen to the end because I want to bring it home and tie it up with a little bow for us. So happy reflecting, and I'll chat with you on the other side.
I hope you got some good reflection in. This might have been one of the episodes where you needed to deposit because you needed more than a couple of minutes. Once you've sat with that question and the sub questions, I really encourage you to take out all of the subjectivity. Once you've got that down, you've got that picture of your present reality. You can invite in just a touch of subjectivity by just asking yourself, okay. Now that I see my present reality, how do I feel about it? How do I feel about my present reality? And I don't want you to think that the goal is then that you need to change things right away or do things. The goal right now is just to get that clear picture of your present reality and to understand how you feel about it. Before I sign off, I want to let you know that I'm teaching a free workshop at the end of the month. It's called a what's next, the myth of certainty and what to seek instead. If you're enjoying these conversations around the past, the present and future I think you're going to love this free workshop. The link is in the show notes for you to RSVP. Thanks so much for listening. Thanks as always for your time and your expertise. Take care!