Kristi Rowles is a Certified Enneagram Coach, a certified Family Life Educator, and has a Masters in in Mental Health Therapy.
We asked Kristi how she spends her days...
and she shared how she's really focusing on listening to herself. Kristi makes a list of everything she needs to do in a day and then she does an internal check-in to see where she should start. Some days that means beginning her day by foam rolling her back. Other days that check in leads to her working from a coffee shop instead of working from home. That process of listening to herself and responding is critical to Kristi's definition of self-care.
Kristi's most cherished self-care practice is simple yet difficult. She's transforming her own self-talk.
Kristi shared how she's learning to speak to herself the way a friend or loved one would. It's all too easy to get in the habit of saying harsh, unthinkable things to ourselves, beating ourselves up for not being enough or doing enough. When Kristi catches herself in a moment of self-critique, she pauses, pictures she’s with someone who loves her, and asks, “What would they say to me right now?” It’s also helpful to ask, “If I switched places with a friend and saw how she’s treating herself, what would I say to her? How would I love her and remind her she’s worthy and wonderful and doing so many amazing things?” That shift in thinking helps her to treat herself with kindness and grace instead of with a critical eye.
When asked if there was anything she wanted to leave readers with, Kristi leaned into the camera and said...
She wanted to remind the women reading this to be gracious and kind to themselves. Whether you're showing up as an entrepreneur, a coworker, friend, or parent, there are always going to be times when you struggle to practice what you preach or be the version of you who you want to be. That's okay. It means you're human, not that you’re a fake or will forever struggle. View the moments when you feel like you're falling short as opportunities to extend grace and self-affection. And if that’s too hard or not working, call a friend and ask them to model the love they have for you. Then remember their words and speak them over yourself again on your next hard day.
"What would someone you love tell you in this moment?"